Leading with Trust

Four Points in Building Trust with Millennials

Millennials“Toto, I’ve a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore.” ~ Dorothy, The Wizard of Oz

Judy Garland’s line from The Wizard Oz could appropriately capture the feeling of many leaders when it comes to managing Millennials in the workplace – it’s a whole new world! Millennials, or Gen Y (born 1982-1995), are rapidly becoming a greater share of the workforce and some studies have estimated that by 2025 they will comprise 75% of the working population. Like each generation before them, they bring a unique blend of attitudes, traits, and characteristics that define how they “show up” at work. Building trust with this generation and leveraging their strengths in the workplace is a pressing priority for today’s generation of leaders.

Earlier this year I had the privilege of participating in a panel discussion on the topic of Trust in Millennial Leaders, on the Trust Across America radio show, hosted by my friend Jon Mertz, a leadership writer and marketing executive. Jon assembled representatives from Gen Y who are in the early stages of their careers along with a couple of “old guys” (me included!) further along in their career.

The insightful discussion produced a number of valuable learning moments, four of which stood out to me as particularly important for leaders to grasp in order to build trust with Millennials.

1. Millennials are a trusting, optimistic generation – Whenever you speak about generational demographics, there is the danger of over-generalizing and stereotyping individuals. With that said, by and large the Millennial generation has a higher propensity to trust others and they value authentic relationships. A study by Deloitte showed that 87% of the Millennials they surveyed reported that they “completely,” “mostly,” or “moderately” trust their boss, with nearly 1 in 3 falling in the “completely” category. This opens the door for leaders to extend trust to the Millennials on their team with the expectation that trust will be reciprocated. Trust is the foundation of any successful relationship and it’s the starting point for leaders interested in maximizing the talents of the younger generation.

2. Tech savviness of Millennials opens new doors – Gen Y is the first workforce generation to grow up completely in the world of modern computers and it fundamentally drives the way they approach work. Millennials take to technology like a fish takes to water and their use of technology is forcing organizations to reevaluate their business practices. The ubiquitous use of social media by Millennials is one prominent example. For many younger workers there is a blending of work and social community interaction through Facebook, Twitter, or other platforms. Today’s leaders need to consider ways to build trust with Millennials through the use of technology rather than viewing these new methods with fear or suspicion.

3. Millennials are quick learners – In large part due to their upbringing in the computer age, Millennials are conditioned to consume, absorb, and apply large amounts of information. (No experience with creating a business plan? Google it and have nearly 3 million options to meet your need!) Because of their fast-paced nature to learn on the fly, many in this generation have gotten the bad rap of not wanting to “pay their dues” or are “entitled” (Generation Me!) to quick promotions and pay raises. Leaders interested in building trust would be wise to avoid labeling Millennials with these stereotypes and treat them on an individual basis. As Jon Mertz pointed out, many Gen Y’ers understand that growth in organizations today is much more horizontally focused than vertically up the traditional corporate ladder.

4. Millennials know the power of community – A common trait of this generation is their focus on social causes and the strength that comes from like-minded individuals banding together to achieve a common goal. Whether it’s assisting in disaster relief, combating slave trafficking, or providing clean water to villagers in Africa, Millennials have emerged as leaders in addressing social issues. What does that mean for organizational leaders? Millennials are naturals at teamwork! Who wouldn’t want that skill in their company? Millennials are eager and ready to accept new responsibilities and have a natural inclination to partner with others to achieve ambitious goals. Rather than forcing Millennials to “wait their turn,” leaders can build trust by looking for appropriate projects and growth opportunities where they can showcase their talents.

I encourage you to listen to the recording of the radio show. I think you’ll come away from the discussion with a greater appreciation for the skills and talents that Millennials bring to the workforce and a greater hope for a bright future with this new generation of leaders.

 8 Comments

 Posted on May 26, 2013 by

 Leadership, Management, Millennials, Trust

Five Benefits of Losing Your Star Players

Top PerformersMy team is undergoing a tremendous amount of change as several of our long-term, star players are moving on to other opportunities both in and outside the organization. For several years the composition of my team has remained relatively stable but now we’re entering a new phase of growth, which is both scary and exciting. It seems like each day I’m having the old Abbott and Costello “Who’s on first?” conversation with my managers, as we try to sort out who’s going, who’s staying, and how we’re getting our work done.

It’s easy to get discouraged when top performers leave your team. The immediate reaction is often to look at all the challenges that lay ahead — How do we replace the intellectual capital that’s walking out the door? Who is going to cover the work while we hire replacements? Will the new hires be able to match the productivity and contributions of the previous employees? All those questions swirl through your mind as you ponder the endless hours you’re going to have to invest in recruiting, interviewing, hiring, and training new team members.

Rather than being discouraged, I’m energized and looking forward to the future because the long-term benefits outweigh the short-term difficulties. Here’s five benefits I see to losing top performers:

1. It proves you’re doing something right. Huh? Doesn’t it mean that something must be wrong with your leadership or team dynamics if you’re losing your top people? Well, if you’re a toxic leader and your team’s morale and performance is in the tank, then yes, there’s something wrong. But if you’re doing a good job of leading it means you’re hiring the right talent and developing them to high performance. I take a little pride in knowing that other leaders see the immense talent I have on my team and they want to hire them away.

2. Your team is better off for their contributions. The contributions of my star players have helped raise the level of professionalism, productivity, and capability of my team over the last several years. They have redefined what “normal” performance looks like and we’ll be looking to existing team members and our new hires to reach that same level. We are better off for having them on our team and I believe they are better off for having been on our team.

3. It provides a chance for existing team members to step up. Losing valuable contributors is an opportunity for other team members to step up their game, either by moving into higher levels of responsibility or by taking on short-term duties to cover the gap. When you have several high-performers on a team, it’s easy for other valuable team members to get buried on the depth-chart (to use a football metaphor). Losing a star player allows second-team players to step into the limelight and prove their capabilities.

4. You can bring in new blood. Having long-term, high-performers on your team brings stability and continuity. However, stability and continuity can easily become routine and complacency if you aren’t careful. Hiring new people brings fresh perspective, a jolt of energy, and a willingness to try new things you haven’t done before. Teams are living organisms and living entities are always growing and changing. I see this as a new era to bring in a fresh crop of star players that will raise our performance to even higher levels.

5. It facilitates needed change. Bringing in new team members is a great time to address broader changes in your business. You have new people who aren’t conditioned to existing work processes, systems, or ways of running your business. They aren’t yet infected with the “that’s the way we’ve always done it around here” virus that tends to infiltrate groups that stay together for a long time. It’s a time to capitalize on the strengths and ideas of new team members to help you take your business to new heights.

Losing high-performers is never easy but it doesn’t have to be devastating. I’m grateful to have worked with star players that are moving on to other challenges and I’m excited about developing a new wave of top performers that will lead us in the years ahead. It’s time for change…Bring it!

 8 Comments

 Posted on May 19, 2013 by

 Change, Leadership, Management, Talent Management

Build Trust Today or Lose Talent Tomorrow – 3 Tips to Keep Your Top People

dear-boss-i-quitIf you ask organizational leaders to name their top five challenges, there’s a good chance that retaining key talent will be on the list. Every person and role in your organization is important, but there are mission critical jobs and high performers that contribute substantially more to your bottom line success and it’s those people you can least afford to lose.

The U.S. Bureau of Labor Statistics reports an increasing trend in voluntary turnover and the rate of unemployment for people with college degrees is about half the national unemployment rate and is decreasing. There is expected to be an ongoing talent shortage well into the next decade as Baby Boomers retire, technology and job specialization increase, global competition for talent rises, and education systems struggle to keep up with the demands of business.

Not only is competition for talent going to increase, the Hay Group reports that 20% of employees plan to look for a new job in the next two years and another 20% plan to leave within the next five years. The reasons cited for jumping ship? Of course the chance to make more money somewhere else is always high on the list, but there is a growing discontent among the workforce after years of low to no pay increases, increased pressure to “do more with less,” and low levels of trust with organizational leaders who have shown little to no regard for their employees.

Building and nurturing high-trust relationships with key talent is essential for keeping them on your team. Here’s three tips to help you build trust and retain talent:

1. Learn the skill of building trust – Yes, you can learn to build trust. Most people don’t give much thought to building trust. They think it “just happens” over time like some sort of relationship osmosis. The fact is that trust is built through the use of very specific behaviors and if you incorporate those behaviors into your leadership practices you will have high-trust relationships.

2. Foster a culture of engagement – High performers are more willing to stay in jobs and organizations where their needs for autonomy, relatedness, and competence are being met. All people, especially your top talent, thrive on being in control of achieving their goals. They want to continue to develop their competence and expertise and establish meaningful relationships with team members.

3. Ask them to stay – Unfortunately, most leaders don’t ask their top performers to stay until they’ve submitted their resignation and are walking out the door. You can build trust with your key talent by engaging in courageous career conversations. Ask your top people what it will take to keep them in your organization and try to find creative ways to provide them opportunities for growth, learning, or expanded responsibilities.

Managing high performers can be just as challenging, if not more so, than managing poor performers. In most cases of poor performance, you can identify specific job skills or personal attributes that need to be improved and put a plan in place to work on those specific issues. When it comes to high performers, you’re constantly having to be creative and find new ways to keep them engaged and growing which can be absolutely exhausting!

Regardless of whatever talent management and retention strategies you employ, building a foundation of trust is critical to the success of keeping your best performers. You can choose to build trust today or lose talent tomorrow.

 24 Comments

 Posted on May 12, 2013 by

 Engagement, Leadership, Management, Motivation, Talent Management, Trust

Three Critical Skills for Managing the Overextended Workforce

DoingMoreWithLess“Doing more with less.” I cringe whenever I hear that phrase because it feels so punitive and unsupportive, and if you’re a leader, I suggest you completely eliminate that phrase from your vocabulary. Whenever you utter those words to your team, your people feel like you don’t understand their circumstances and it erodes trust and confidence in your leadership. They think you just don’t get it.

I’ve found three strategies helpful in dealing with the challenge of doing more with less:

1. Communicate the reality to your team – Share all the information you have about your business, including the good, bad, and ugly. Let people know what’s going on. Information is viewed as power, and if you withhold it from your people, they view you with suspicion and think you’re untrustworthy and power-hungry. People without information cannot act responsibly. People with information are compelled to act in the best interests of your organization.

2. Create a high-involvement strategy – If you’re sharing information with your team, the next step is to solicit their involvement in helping solve your business challenges. Ask for their ideas and gather their input. Who knows better how to solve your pressing business issues than the people who are doing the work on the frontlines? There is an old saying that goes “People who plan the battle rarely battle the plan.” Get your people working with you, not against you.

3. Dial up support for your people – Listening is a great first step in letting people know you care. Take time to understand their frustrations and challenges so you can make better informed decisions. Another way to support your people is to jump in the trenches with them and help them get the work done. Why do you think the President always tours disaster areas, picks up a shovel, and helps workers for a period of time? He does that to send the message that we’re all in this together and he’s not too busy to lend a hand. Being visible and present is key to supporting your team. There’s no way your team is going to follow you if you’re missing in action when the bullets are flying.

On Wednesday, May 8th, 9:00-10:30 a.m. PST, I’ll be one of three speakers conducting an online workshop on this topic of “doing more with less” and managing the overextended workforce. Motivation expert Susan Fowler will be speaking on “Motivating Yourself and Your Team During Stressful Times” while leadership speaker Ann Phillips will address “What Leaders Can Do To Recognize and Head-Off Employee Meltdowns.” I’ll share “How to Become the Kind of Leader that Others Trust.” I hope you’ll be able to join us!

3Critical_Skills_Slide_V2

 2 Comments

 Posted on May 5, 2013 by

 Communication, Leadership, Management, Motivation, Performance Management, Stress, Trust

Trust Works! Four Keys to Building Lasting Relationships

Trust Works Book CoverTrust is the foundation of any successful relationship, but oddly enough, most of us don’t think about it until it’s been broken. By that time, it may be too late to gain it back. Trust doesn’t “just happen” through some sort of magical relationship osmosis. It’s built and sustained through the use of very specific behaviors. Whether you’re a leader, coach, teacher, parent, or friend, the skill of building trust is critical to the success of your relationships.

In his newest book, Trust Works! Four Keys to Building Lasting Relationships, Ken Blanchard and his co-authors Cynthia Olmstead and Martha Lawrence, share the four elements of trust that are critical to any healthy and lasting relationship. The four elements of trust are illustrated by the ABCD Trust Model™. You build trust when you are:

Able – Demonstrate Competence. People show they are able when they have the expertise needed for their job, role, or position. They consistently achieve results and are effective problem solvers and decision makers. Demonstrating competence inspires others to have confidence and trust in you.

Believable – Act with Integrity. Trustworthy people are honest with others. They behave in a manner consistent with their stated values, treat people fairly, and behave ethically. “Walking the talk” is essential in building trust in relationships.

Connected – Care About Others. Being connected means focusing on people, having good communication skills, and recognizing the contributions of others. Caring about others builds trust because people don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.

Dependable – Maintain Reliability. Dependable people follow through on their commitments. They respond timely to requests and hold themselves and others accountable. Not doing what you say you will do quickly erodes trust with others.

Ken Blanchard tells you all about the book in the following video.

 29 Comments

 Posted on April 28, 2013 by

 ABCD Trust Model, Book Reviews, Leadership, TrustWorks!

Two Things Your Boss Should Never Have to Talk to You About

Tyler RoyA few weeks ago I was watching my son compete at a high school track meet when I ran into Tyler, a young man whom I had the pleasure of coaching in baseball a few years back. Tyler was there to cheer on his sister, a member of the opposing squad, and we caught up on how his baseball season was going. Tyler plays on his high school’s varsity team but isn’t getting quite as much playing time as he’d like.

I see Tyler fairly regularly, and since he still calls me “Coach,” I couldn’t help but offer some on-the-spot coaching to help encourage him. I said “Tyler, when I coached you I always appreciated that I never had to say anything to you about your effort and attitude. You always worked hard in practices and games, gave your best effort, and always displayed an excellent attitude with coaches and teammates. Effort and attitude are two things that you completely control. You can’t control how much playing time you get, but you have 100% control over the amount of effort you give and the attitude you choose to have. Keep working hard, have a great attitude, and your time will come.”

Your boss should never have to ask you to give a better effort or improve your attitude.

There are a lot of things about work we can’t control – angry customers, heavy workloads, annoying co-workers, bad bosses, or dysfunctional teams, just to name a few. But your personal effort and attitude? Totally under your control.

Here’s some coaching tips that may help you improve in these areas:

Effort

  • Be organized. Plan your work. Work your plan.
  • Prioritize. Balance the urgent and important tasks. Don’t just work hard, work smart.
  • Don’t multi-task. It’s a myth, it’s stupid, and it doesn’t work. Start a task and finish it.
  • Stay focused by working in 20-30 minute phases and then take a 3-5 minute break. It helps you maintain your attention and energy levels.
  • Identify the high performers in your role. Watch how they work. Do what they do.
  • Keep learning, growing, and improving your skills.

Attitude

  • Focus on the positive elements of your job, not the negative.
  • Follow Mom’s advice. If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say anything at all.
  • Assume best intentions. Most people aren’t trying to intentionally ruin your day.
  • Get a coach or mentor. Having someone to help you see the bigger picture keeps things in perspective.
  • Exercise. Eat healthy. Pick up a hobby. It’s important to take care of yourself and find ways to relieve stress.
  • Prayer, meditation, solitude, and other spiritual practices help keep you balanced.

Effort and attitude, two things always under your control. Will you control them?

 14 Comments

 Posted on April 21, 2013 by

 Attitude, Coaching, Commitment, Motivation, Sports, Success

Decide, Learn, Adapt – A Mantra for Avoiding Analysis Paralysis

Decide Learn AdaptAnalysis Paralysis (AP) has been stalking me the last few weeks. Like an obsessed, crazy ex-girlfriend, AP has been hounding me at every turn. She’s been encouraging me to delay decisions, seek out additional data, and gather input from more people, all in an effort to rekindle a relationship I’d rather forget.

It’s no coincidence that AP has re-entered my life. She often shows up when work is busy and I’m having to manage through significant periods of change. She beckons me to take comfort in delaying decisions for just one more day. It’s safer that way, she says. You’ll have more information tomorrow…you’ll think more clearly in the morning…it’s no big deal, people can wait another day. These are all things AP says to me, and I have to admit, they sound pretty darn good.

But I don’t want to be in relationship with AP. I’ve been there, done that, and have the t-shirt to prove it. So I came up with a new mantra this week to keep AP at arm’s length. When it comes to navigating through the murky waters of change, I’m going to decide, learn, and adapt.

Decide – I’ve learned that I will rarely have all the information and data I would like in order to make the perfect decision. In today’s environment of rapid-fire change, perfect decisions don’t exist. I’ve committed to making the best decision possible given what I know at the present time. Will it be 100% correct the first time? Probably not. But at least I’ll be doing something to move forward rather than hanging out with AP and doing nothing.

Learn – AP has tried to convince me in the past that spending time with her is the smart thing to do because it will allow me to make better decisions and avoid costly mistakes. Well, I’ve learned that making mistakes is actually one of the best ways to learn and improve. I’m going to decide on a course of action, pursue it, and see what I learn from the experience.

Adapt – Learning is great, but if you don’t do anything with the new-found knowledge, it doesn’t have much value. Adapting is putting learning into practice and it’s much more attractive to me that being in relationship with AP. She likes to tell me that I have to get things 100% right the first time and it’s not OK to change course after I’ve made a decision. That’s just another one of her manipulative lies.

Decide, learn, adapt. Decide, learn, adapt. Decide, learn, adapt. It’s an iterative cycle of managing change by making the best decision possible given the information available, learning from the successes and failures of the experience, and adapting to the new reality based on what has been learned.

Best of all, it keeps me away from Analysis Paralysis. That girl is bad news.

 13 Comments

 Posted on April 14, 2013 by

 Change, Decision-Making, Leadership

Six Ways You’re a Workplace Bully Without Even Realizing It

Mike RiceBullying has been on primetime display this week as basketball coach Mike Rice was fired from his head coaching job at Rutgers after a leaked practice video showed him pushing, grabbing, throwing balls at players, and cursing them with gay slurs. As a youth sports coach for over 15 years and the father of a 20 year-old college student, I was sickened at Rice’s conduct. There is absolutely no room for that kind of behavior in sports, school, or the workplace. Leaders have to be held to a higher standard.

Bullying is not just verbal or physical intimidation of someone. Especially in the workplace, bullying can manifest itself in many subtle ways. Any behavior you use to intimidate, dominate, embarrass, harass, or purposely make someone feel inferior could be considered bullying.

Here are six subtle ways you may be acting like a workplace bully without even realizing it:

1. You are condescending – When you act in a condescending manner, whether it’s patronizing someone, being dismissive of a person’s contributions, or minimizing someone’s accomplishments in order to highlight yours, you are sending a message that you believe you are superior to the other person.

2. Wounding with sarcasm – I like sarcastic humor as much as the next guy, but there is a huge difference between sarcasm that highlights the irony of a situation and is self-deprecating, versus sarcasm that is intended to belittle and injure another person. Next time you’re ready to drop that witty, sarcastic joke, pause and consider if it will build up the other person or tear her down.

3. Being cliquish – Cliques aren’t only for high school. Unfortunately, many adults carry that same behavior into the workplace. Purposely excluding people from activities is a bullying behavior intended to send the message that “you’re not one of us” and “we’re better than you are.” Trusted leaders look for opportunities to include people so they feel valued and appreciated.

4. Thinking you know it all – Have you ever worked with a person who thinks she knows it all? How annoying is that?! Much like behaving in a condescending manner, acting like you are the all-knowing expert is a way to intimidate others to go along with your ideas or wishes. Just stop it! No one really believes you anyway.

5. Being passive-aggressive – Perhaps one of the most subtle forms of bullying and manipulation, passive-aggressive behavior poisons teams, departments, and organizations. A common trait of bullies is expressing aggression in order to intimidate another person. Passive-aggressive people are bullies who express aggression in indirect ways such as disguising hostility in jokes, stubbornness, procrastination, resentment, or giving just the minimum effort required. I perceive passive-aggressive people as double-agent bullies disguised as victims. Watch out for them!

6. Gossipping – Have you ever considered gossipping as a form of bullying? Probably not, but it easily could be considered bullying, and some experts even consider it a form of workplace violence because it’s intended to harm another individual or group. Why do people gossip? It’s to make themselves feel powerful. The gossipper believes she knows something that other people don’t and she uses that information as leverage to elevate herself above others.

Leaders are charged with bringing out the best in their people and I don’t understand how some leaders, particularly sports coaches, believe that bullying is an acceptable form of motivation. It’s not. It’s belittling, destructive, demeaning, dehumanizing, and does nothing but feed the power-hungry ego of the bullying leader.

If you’re a leader in the workplace, whether it’s in an office, factory, warehouse, construction site, or any other place, make sure you’re not being a bully without even realizing it. You’re better than that and your people deserve your best.

 20 Comments

 Posted on April 7, 2013 by

 Bullying, Ego, Emotions, Fear, Integrity, Leadership, Management, Power, Relationships, Self-Control, Sports, Toxic Leadership, Trust Busters

Lack of Self-Control Erodes Trust – 5 Ways to Bolster Trust and Self-Control

Self ControlI lack self-control around donuts. Donuts are to me what kryptonite is to Superman. They render me weak, helpless, and virtually incapable of escaping their mesmerizing powers. Once I bite into the soft and fluffy baked goodness, all of my self-control goes out the window. On a Friday morning just a few weeks ago I used my expert leadership skills to organize a donut acquisition initiative (basically scrounging up money around the office and sending our gopher…errr…newest team member, to run to the local donut shop). After devouring half the box, I spent the rest of the afternoon in a donut coma, glazed and confused.

Recent research shows that our lack of self-control influences people’s perceptions of our trustworthiness. Researchers at the Vrije Universiteit Amsterdam conducted four different experiments to gauge the relationship between a person’s self-control and perceptions of his/her trustworthiness. In the first experiment, subjects read a story about a student with money problems who either resisted the urge to spend money for music CD’s or splurged on purchasing a whole stack. In rating the self-control and trustworthiness of the student, the subjects gave the cost-conscious student significantly higher scores on both self-control and trustworthiness than the free-spender.

In the second experiment, couples rated their partner on trustworthiness and specific behaviors related to self-control: goal achievement, reliability, and forgiveness. The most forgiving, reliable, and successful partners were rated the most trustworthy. The third and fourth experiments focused on the factors of temporary depletion of self-control and its influence on trustworthiness. Subjects were less likely to trust someone when he/she had just completed 15 minutes of a strenuous task than someone who had only spent 2 minutes on the task (measured through an economic game involving the subject).

I’m sure I’m not the only one that battles with a lack of self-control. Whether it’s eating too many donuts, losing our temper, running late for appointments, or failing to deliver on commitments, we all have our challenges. Here’s five steps to improve our trustworthiness through better self-control:

1. Don’t make promises you can’t keep — Being a dad has taught me the value of this lesson. If you’re a parent, how many times have you heard your child say “But Mom/Dad, you promised!” I only promise to do something that I know I’ll be able to do, otherwise I try to set clear expectations of what I’m committing to do so that I’ll be able to follow through. It’s a cliché but it’s true and effective—under-promise and over-deliver.

2. Admit your weaknesses — My team knows that I love donuts and they are a particular weakness of mine. So when I occasionally fall off the wagon and go on a donut binge, they are more forgiving and less judgmental of my actions than if I pretended to be a health food junkie and looked down on those who eat donuts. Admit your weaknesses and ask for others to help you follow-through on your good intentions.

3. Forgive yourself and others — People who forgive themselves and others are perceived as more trustworthy than those who don’t. Forgiveness reveals a vulnerable and authentic side of your self that draws people to you. Forgiveness communicates a message of understanding and empathy for someone, oftentimes because the one granting forgiveness has faced the same or similar challenges and has been granted forgiveness from others in the past.

4. Don’t react in the HEAT of the moment — It’s incredibly tempting and easy to lose self-control when you are Hungry, Emotional, Angry, or Tired. If you are experiencing any of those factors, it’s best to pause, assess the circumstances, and choose a course of action that will affirm your self-control and maintain your trustworthiness.

5. Take baby steps — In many ways self-control is like a muscle. The more you use it the stronger it becomes. Research has shown that taking small steps to enhance your self-control can help you resist the more tempting situations in your life. Just like trying to run a marathon without sufficient training is a recipe for failure, trying to tackle the big self-control problems you face without adequate preparation will only lead to additional failures that erode trust with yourself and the people around you.

Have you ever lost trust with someone who exhibited a lack of self-control? Feel free to leave a comment so we can learn from your experiences.

 8 Comments

 Posted on March 31, 2013 by

 Forgiveness, Relationships, Repairing Trust, Self-Control, Trust

March Madness! Duke’s Coach K on Leading With Trust

Coach K Cutting Down the NetI love March Madness! The NCAA Men’s Basketball Tournament is one of the most exciting events in sports, offering crazy upsets, game winning shots, and athletic drama unlike any other sporting event.

Duke’s coach Mike Krzyzewski knows a thing or two about winning when it counts. He is the winningest coach in Division I college basketball history with 955 wins and over a 36 year career has won four national titles, appeared in 11 Final Fours, and experienced just four losing seasons.

After setting the all-time wins record in November 2011, ESPN’s Rece Davis asked Coach K this question: “What’s the single most important characteristic for a coach to have to achieve the things you’ve achieved?”

Mike Krzyzewski’s answer is simple, yet profound, and is one that leaders everywhere should take to heart if they want to maximize their leadership influence. Here’s what he said:

“I think you have to be trustworthy. You have to take the time to develop a relationship that’s so strong with each individual player, and hopefully with the team, that they will trust you. They let you in, and if they let you in, you can teach. If they don’t let you in, you’re never going to get there.”

When Coach K references his players “letting him in,” he points to the heart. It’s not just a casual, conversational gesture. He’s making a specific point about tapping into his players’ heart – the emotional core of who they are as people. Coach K intentionally focuses on developing a trusting relationship with each of his players because he knows without that absolute level of trust, he won’t be able to teach them how to transform their potential into performance.

The same principle applies to leaders in any organization. In order to achieve success, you have to take the time to establish meaningful, trust-based relationships with your team members. If your people don’t trust you, they won’t be receptive to your coaching on ways they can improve their performance. If your team can’t trust that you’ll have their back when they fail, they won’t take the necessary risks needed to move your business forward.

Conversely, trust enables your team to confront the brutal facts of their performance and find ways to get better. Trust allows individuals to set aside their personal ego for the betterment of the team and commit wholeheartedly to pursuing a common goal. Trust is what allows leaders to tap into the collective hearts and souls of their followers to achieve greater levels of success as a team than they could ever reach individually.

Beyond the career milestones, and he’s had plenty, leading with trust is Mike Krzyzewski’s most enduring legacy. In that regard, we should all try to be like Mike.

“In leadership, there are no words more important than trust.
In any organization, trust must be developed among every member of the team if success is going to be achieved.”
Leading With The Heart ~ Mike Krzyzewski

 8 Comments

 Posted on March 24, 2013 by

 Coaching, Leadership, Sports, Trust

Trust is…

trustTrust is…

Simple—When you break it down into its essential components of competence, integrity, benevolence, and dependability, trust is really pretty simple. Be good at what you do. Act with integrity. Demonstrate care and concern for people. Do what you say you will do. Simple.

Complex—There is a vast and complex set of variables that influence the development of trust with people and in organizations. The company culture, policies and procedures, governance systems, and the behavior of senior leaders are just a few of the organizational variables. Interpersonal variables include temperament and personality types, level of emotional intelligence, nationality, and life experiences all shape a person’s perception of trust.

Powerful—Trust is the fuel that powers personal and organizational success. With it, all things are possible. People are willing to take risks, reach for the stars, and invest their all. Without it, success moves out of reach. People pull back, productivity goes down the drain, and progress grinds to a halt.

Fragile—One careless act can instantaneously destroy trust that has taken years to develop, especially when the breach of trust involves a personal character failure.

Strong—Trust is one of the strongest forces on earth. When high levels of trust exist, relationships can endure the ambiguity and unknown of this world. Even if trust suffers a major blow, it can recover and be stronger than before if the parties are willing to work at rebuilding it.

Forgiving—Trust assumes the best intentions of others and looks to forgive when someone falls short of expectations. Trust knows that people aren’t perfect and that mistakes will happen, but people will generally prove themselves worthy of the trust placed in them.

Essential—Trust is the foundation of any healthy, successful relationship. Whether it’s between people, organizations, or countries, trust is essential for mutual cooperation and respect.

Earned—If you want it, you’ve got to earn it. Trust is earned over time through consistent and trustworthy behavior.

Given—If you want it, you’ve got to give it. Extending trust to someone is a trust booster – it builds trust in a relationship. Someone has to make the first move so it might as well be you.

Exponential—Trust feeds on itself and grows exponentially over time. One trust boosting behavior begets another, and another, and another, and before you know it, you have a high trust relationship.

Behavioral—People need to see it to believe it. Words are great, but actions are better. Demonstrate trustworthy behavior in all you do and you’ll never have to worry about someone questioning your character.

Leadership—Leadership is about influencing others, and if people don’t trust you, you won’t be able to influence them. Leadership and trust go hand in hand. You can’t have one without the other.

What is trust to you? Leave a comment and complete the phrase: Trust is…

 35 Comments

 Posted on March 17, 2013 by

 Uncategorized

Three Questions That Could Save Your Career

Three QuestionsThe question is not if you will ever face an ethical dilemma, the question is when. Ethical dilemmas come in all shapes and sizes and you will inevitably be faced with a situation where you find yourself at a crossroads. Do you choose to do something that is wrong in order to benefit yourself, even if no one will ever know, or do you choose to do the right thing?

“There is no right way to do a wrong thing.”

Last week I wrote about the five P’s of ethical power that Ken Blanchard and Norman Vincent Peale discuss in their book The Power of Ethical Management. In that classic best-seller they also offer an “ethics check,” three questions you should ask yourself when faced with an ethical choice point. Asking yourself these three questions could save you from making a decision that ends your career.

Is it legal? The first of the three ethics check questions goes right to the core of the matter. Is what you are going to do legal? Does it violate civil law, corporate policy, or your own code of ethics? If the answer is No then STOP! There’s no need to even ask the next two questions. To take it a step further, if choosing to proceed could even give the appearance of illegal activity, you should avoid that course of action.

Is it fair and balanced? Assuming you answer Yes to the legality of the decision, the next question to ask yourself is whether or not your action will be fair and balanced to the parties involved. Will your decision or action result in one party being taken advantage of by another to the point of their detriment? Is there a clear winner and loser involved? The parties can’t always win equally in every situation, but you should strive to avoid great imbalances in the fairness of your actions. Ideally you want to strive for decisions that promote long-term fairness and respect in relationships.

How will it make you feel about yourself? If your actions were published on the home page of CNN.com, how would you feel? Would you feel proud of the decision you made or cringe in embarrassment that your actions were on display for the whole world to see? Besides your behavior being publicized, how would your decision align with your own sense of right and wrong? Most of us have a pretty good sense of when we’re on shaky ethical ground, yet we often try to rationalize our behavior in order to feel good about ourselves. I love the quote from John Wooden, the legendary UCLA basketball coach. He said, “There is no pillow as soft as a clear conscience.” If your decision is legal and balanced, yet something about it just doesn’t sit well with your conscience, then it’s probably not the right decision to make.

I’ve asked hundreds of people this question: “What is the most important factor in building trust?” Overwhelmingly the response is “integrity.” Integrity is a leader’s most valuable asset and using the ethics check questions can help you keep it intact and avoid what could be a career ending decision.

 8 Comments

 Posted on March 10, 2013 by

 Decision-Making, Ethics, Fairness, Honesty, Integrity, Leadership, Responsibility, Values

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